Fone Forum

A desperate woman writes to the Technical support Guy.

 "Dear Tech Support,
 
 Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance,
 particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
 
 In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as  Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
 undesirable programs such as  NEWS 5.0,   MONEY 3.0  and CRICKET 4.1.
 
 Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
 
 Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
 
 What can I do?
 
 Signed,
 
 Desperate Woman

 ************ ********* ********* *********
 
 DEAR DESPERATE Madam,
 
 First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
 
 Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme. html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
 If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
 
 However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
 
 Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually
 seize control of all your system resources.)
 
 In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
 
 In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.
 You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
 We recommend:  Cooking 3.0 and  Hot Looks 7...7.
 
 Good Luck   
 For more details contact to,

  Technical support Guy"

This is so funny I cant stop laughing!

well husband also writes to technical support guy...

Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.
I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that
took up a lot of space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activities.
Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5..0, Playing cards 7.5,
and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever selected. I
can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my
favourite applications.
I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0 , but the 'uninstall'
doesn't work on Wife 1.0.
Please help!

Thanks,!
"A Troubled User"

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.
Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!
It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0.
It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.
You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony-Child Support) .
I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the environment.
I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.
The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.!
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0, Cook 1.5 and Do Laundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs, improper use will cause the system to launch the program fight 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend suits 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0 and dinner at PC 2.9.

WARNING: DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

very funny lol. ;D